My Diagnosis

My diagnosis reads as follows:
FRAGMENTS OF INVASIVE, GRADE 1, DUCTAL CARCINOMA OF THE BREAST.

I don't like that word "invasive", but as I have googled to read up a bit, I have also come to the conclusion that, 'if you have to pick a cancer to have...'

I will meet with my surgeon on Tuesday of this week. This will be a consultation and I hope to be armed with a bit more information. The radiologist showed me the mammogram pictures after my biopsy. There was no visible lump on those pictures, but I may still need to undergo a lumpectomy. Hopefully, my consultation will provide some answers.

My mother is a breast cancer survior. Our cases are almost identical in terms of how the lump was found and even the diagnosis' are identical. As odd as it is, this gives some measure of comfort in anticipating what is to come next. I don't know that my treatment will be identical, but it doesn't seem as unknown I guess. This fact was very helpful when we told our two children last Monday that I have breast cancer.

Our 5 year old is happily unaware of the evils of cancer and seems to be going about life as usual. Our 9 year old's initial reaction was one of fear. We went on to explain and reinforce all the positives - it was caught very early, my treatment will probably not be too hard (compared to other's), we're going to fight this cancer together and most importantly, God will be with us.

The first question she asked was, "Is Mommy going to die?" We answered this one carefully. We will all die and we have no way of knowing when, cancer or not. Our answer was, "No, this cancer is very treatable and Mommy is going to be okay." But we also emphasized the Sovereignty of God and our trust in Him.

The second question was, "Is Mommy going to lose her hair?" On the surface this seems like a question about looks and to some degree it is. My husband, always one to lighten a moment replied, "If Mommy loses her hair, I'm going to shave my head too. Do you want to shave your head if Mommy loses her hair?", to which an emphatic "No!" was the reply. As I pondered our daughter's question a little more, I think this question was also one of wondering what was going to change in our lives. Perhaps I am glad she didn't ask that question. I don't know the answer. Only God and time will reveal, at least in part, the answer to that question...

My diagnosis is this: (thanks Rachelle)
God is who He says He is
God can do what He says He can do
I am who God says I am
I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me
God's Word is alive and active in me